Damn

Here for a good time and adventure!

Making many many mistakes along the way.

Hurting others, ruining plans, bailing.

Making big plans. Letting ideas run wild.

Cleaning out my storage unit of shit and “baggage".

It’s not easy. It takes so much focus and energy.

Gotta make room for new things. New adventures.

I can’t carry all my baggage on these adventures. It weighs too much.

I must detach and run free.

Run naked through the woods and into the river.

Being like water. Flowing like water. Consistent like water.

Cutting new paths, moving earth.

So destructive, yet so life giving and bearing.

Essential.

We’re all essential to life.

We all matter.

Your life matters.

My life matters.

Im trying my best.

But damn, it’s hard.

Willing to fail, to fall, to get hurt.

Least willing to hurt others.

Maybe I’ll do nothing and be nothing so I don’t hurt anyone.

Damn.

Maybe I’ll do everything and be everything so I help others.

Damn.

A more balanced idea or combination could be better.

Damn.

Be like water thats free.

Brake through the dams.

Let no dam stop the water.

Dam.

Damn.

I miss clean river water.

I’m in Vegas right now after the first day of MJ Bizcon after a mentally tough day dealing with promoting a homies business. I came here to help, but being treated unfairly will make some people want to run away. An older version of me would have, or just would have put my head down and ignored negative feelings. Instead I stood up for myself and had a couple hard conversations. I learned a lot. I’m proud of myself.

Im laying in the hotel bed after a bath and nice dinner. I decided to relax and not push myself today and tonight after the stressful morning/day. Feeling out the vibes and listening to my gut each moment and releasing any expectations I have.

Im being like water.

I’ll find the cracks in any dam and I will persevere.

Strong and soft.

Hot and Cold.

Damn.